taking advantage of sensativity..........

im an emotional monster but if i wasnt will i go thru all this pain yall put me thru?.................i dont think people understand how much effort i put into everything i do but people dont care they just care for themselfs but its ok cause this is jay he will never change and i will always care for everyone in this world.....................i will always love you i will always be there and i will never give up but will you the same? ........people will always look at my flaws and not the best things out of me for an example wen i got arrested i lost everything even my pride people called me a bum loser and all life from there was hard but now im just fcked up in my head from all the words that people called me but look at me now still standing strong and ready for more............

Lost in the world............

on the bathroom wall i wrote "i'd rather argue with you than to be with someon and else" i took a piss and dismiss it and went and found somebody else Arguing harvesting the feelings, id rather be by my fcking self till about 2AM and i call back and i hang up and start to blame myself..............somebody help .......................Lack of visual empathy equates the meaning of L-O-V-E hatred and attitude tear us entirely IM the king of leon.............this life is wild but you gotta be stronger then your heart or it can damage your thoughts so slow down and look at everything as if your on top of the clouds and then youll get the best view of wat u can do wit this thing called L-I-F-E ......... your my devil, your my angel, your my heaven ,your my hell, your my now, your my forever, your my freedom, your my jail your my lies, your my truth, your my war, your my truce, your my questions, your my proof, your my stress and your my masseuse............THIS UPSIDE DOWN WORLD

if i go will i lose everythin and if i stay will i have everythin........

Im closer to the truth then ya think...........

...........Why as people are w

e losing hope in eachother i

s that cause were caught up or we gave up?.....LIfe is more precious then a diamond cause not as people we shine more but were beautiful each of us as human beens and we shouldnt outkast one another but were lost and this is why i have such a big heart cause we dnt all give the correct amount of love that should be needed e

ven myself is scared of a thing called life and say what shouldnt be said but if my hope

love and faith is put in the air i know my love ones and

myself will be just ok..........my message to you is love i feel the world in my hands anybody wanna hand.......... ..................................people change but this jay everyday keep my head up and my thoughts right i will always leave a stamp were i stand cause everyone feels my energy and feed off cause me as a person is bigger then you think youll see as you grow with me and realize you always loved me...........
im starting to know the truth meaning everything starts to make sense when your knowledge is more expandable i love the person iam but the mind is the most difficult i soak like a sponge everyday about people friends family and understand that its part of thing you can only provide to yourself and take it in as a person....... Timeless it goes on but how can impact the numbers you have..........

Chapter 9.....You are mY Lif3

Once all alone
I was lost in a world of strangers
No one to trustOn my own, I was lonely
You suddenly appeared
It was cloudy before but now it's clearYou took away the fearAnd you brought me back to the light

These girls aint got nothing on you....

The way I’m feelin’
Things I say
All just happenWhen you pass my way
What can I do
To make you stay?I know it’s gettin’ lateBut girl I don’t want you to leaveYou tell me you’re just not the type
You wanna do this rightAnd I’m not tryna say I don’t believe you
But I refuse to feel ashamedAnd if you feel the same
This wait ain’t gonna make us better peopleTake those f-ckin’ heels off, it’s worth it girl
Nothin’ is what I can picture you in...................... Lately ive been in a hell of a mess i didnt know time was so hard and then conflicts start to begin and all falls but u gotta be a solider of love and then youll be able to carry anything from shoulder to shoulder and realize all along you were just the strongest
ever

i ride over the bridge cause bike riding has its own happiness you just ride and and connect wit nature

life feels good on two wheels.... it gets crazy at times and then it registers to be love understand my mr big red and give him a hand........

I sTiLl goT It FoR YOuu..................

i feel good, i got some time off girl it's been so long,
did you have fun, cause i'ma need a cab just to get me home,
and maybe you can call in sick, then bring it to the crib and get all this,
i know, i know i'm blunt but how real is that, you want that feelin' back,
then you should know..............................i love you but why are u walkin and then you act like you not sick cause the love is stronger then your hate that u have for the kid but deeper then thoughts inside you chest i always felt the beat towards my head and realized your in love wit a man you can never resist so pretend and forget to listen cause im the one whos stayin can u keep sayin or do u plan on makin a thing called L-O-V-E ?????????????

Im rare just like my Blogs..............

Im gonna piss on all of you cause im gonna make it and

leave a trail to follow my steps............ my life flash right before my eyes............walking home in the rain wit a good friend of mine and if he didnt say a word im probly be in the hospital as of right now but that was more like a wake up call keep my eyes open..............I hope one day we get married just to say we fckin did it and girl im fckin serious im wit it if your wit it cause your beauty turns me on and your sex is very vicious...............................Nothing ever changes so tonight is like tomorrow night bet its goin down we gonna make it right this is wat they mean when they talk about the life..........gettin the fohawk back

sooner than later................

sorry blog ive been gone for a WHILE but here are my thoughts thats been floating around.......... im tired of bein despised by people who really dnt know the person iam but everybody has there image set on me as a regular man.........im a normal human been but my thoughts and mind is brighter then alot of these schemes i never been in the water of god so maybe that pushes me out the picture of you others but dnt judge me cause im better then half of these niccas......dnt be scared of me........................im a beast at wat i do so come see me on the courts i might show u a thing or two......................This is what loves look like but you gotta learn how use those words and put them in correct action cause then u can lose something that is right..........your special and you dont even know it but i knew it from the get go....i might have to take a couple steps back cause i dnt wANNa rush into things you arent ready for but remember youll always have my heart cause your the girl i wanted from the start..............Everyone remember the time is comin and anything can happen but we have eachother so lets be a family and be ready for the happening.......THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE

im not afraid of dyin im afraid of not trying.....

i really cant see the end gettin any closer...........

i Did it over night it couldnt happen any quicker.............son said jay how you get so fly "i said from not bein afraid to fall out the sky"................

you can run and tell my city im on.........iam what everybody in my past dont want me to be...............GUESS WHAT? i made it im the mother fckin man i just want you to see get a load of this image....LIfe is but a dream to me and i dont know why we be here but since we gotta be here life is but a beach cair............

I REALLY WANNA BE A MODEL.....

wat does it take to have that perfect body and show to the world?hard work and motivation i thinks its time.......

chapter 4

today is chapetr 4 lol yea its not that much but it is for me and no matter wat two characters go through they always end the paragraph with a a big hug a huge kiss and ily duces ......more time to come but remember who can stand last an who can put up wit who knows this is real stop pushing im to strong lol.....

W@t is Lov3..........

i can sit here and right a million things about what i think love is but im not cause i dnt have to explain lol.......But if i had to explain wat my description of wat it is to me here i go its hate/fighthing/arguing/crying/pain/happiness/inspiration /thankful/thoughtful/sad/hurt/angey/but last but not least beautiful...............that pic right there is the same night she started feeling something shes in denial but ill just let it happen........another description of love is us....honestly and truthly were exculsive sometimes its impossible to find these relationships but hey it took me 20 years..................some people may never find true love or even understand the real meaning but if you do cherish every moment and be greatful to have it cause alot of people dnt experience that fun of it all so hey this is my meaning of love and i know what it is cause i been through all and i dnt want anyone else in my life but scarlet lol but i know wat love is now i finally found it do you know wat love is ?.................and youll get those latenight calls like now lol....

F.R.I.E.N.D.S

these three cats is my dudes we been through alot and done alot for the amount of time weve knew each other but we created a brother hood even though we busy men and dont get to hang as much we still hold each other down MadHouse...... thats my dude right there left hand man like a brother from another mother.....

this is my Gonnie to the left right here even though we aint clicking right now thats my older sis i never had gots mucho love.......

kyel sometimes i wonder wat the hell this kid be thinking but other then that mad cool dude people judge but he ight get to know him......and to the left thats my crew/fam i ride wit these dudes grew up wit them and fought wit them but this is family and what cant makes us wont break us love yall.............

A very good bf even though we been very distant she taught me alot and the way to treat women thanks you biff..................and i save the best for last cause this is my closes friend ever i slip out some things that i should of never said but we hold eachother down this is the only person i can really talk to and trust and honestly i told her things that nobody will ever know but thats my bestfriend/friend/lover/gf/slacker but who else is gonna put her wit her thats my G love her like a fat kid loves cake.......and these are my true friends who are yours?

The weekends...........

so this weekend was a blurrr but it opened up my eyes wide open as big as those glasses lol but like my girl said there always next week..........i was lil angry at someone but maybe i took it the wrong way but i just gotta know if its real cause feelings are the key to life and an heart............and the pic up top to the right is a meaning of me showing you im ready for wats out there cause i been through more you can imagine but life is like a spoon full of sugar always sweet and bitter............still love u alot scarlet.............another thing im thinking of joining the military what you think??????

life so priceless

yall seem to be stuck on that beginner stage im on fire and i been a blaze .......summer comming and so much to do kinda of excited and espically cause of u know whom...

i think shes my first real best friend but a very good lover......i hope one day it can happen?hmmmmm